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The Power of Sisterhood

Lauren and Kristen: The Power of Sisterhood

Transcript of episode one of At The Kitchen Counter Podcast

Lauren: Welcome to the Kitchen Counter Podcast. I’m Lauren.

Kristen: And I’m kristen.

Lauren: And we’re so excited to talk to you a little bit today about the power of sisterhood and basically just the whole reason why we started this podcast. But before we jump into it, I do have a little question just to kind of warm up our voices for a little bit. Is that okay? Kristen, are you ready? Really hard one. I just want to know what your favorite treat is right now, because I feel like with the Halloween candy coming out and just, like, the change of seasons, there’s some good stuff out there. So I want to know what you’re eating and snacking on right now.

Kristen: There are! I actually just bought my first bag of Halloween candy and York Peppermint Patties. That is my number one. I’m digging for that one. So we’ll say that’s my favorite treat right now.

Lauren: Is that a Christmas candy? A York peppermint patty.

Kristen: No, all year round. You can buy it all year. Maybe in the shape of a minty bat. It’s just a circle. But I do love them.

Lauren: That’s so funny. Okay, well, mine is also a Halloween candy, and it is a bag of Reese’s bats or pumpkins, whatever shape you prefer. But put them in your freezer, you just go back to them all day every time your kids are not looking. Oh, man. It’s my current favorite. Every Reese’s is better when it’s in the shape of a holiday.

Kristen: I agree. I agree with you.

Lauren: Okay, well, I wanted to talk a little bit today. I feel like the podcast kind of came out of nowhere. We’ve been sharing food for such a long time. We’re really comfortable in the kitchen and kind of hiding behind food. It’s a little bit scary to just be out there without anything in front of us to do with our game.

Kristen: Yes, I agree. Right.

Lauren: But this has kind of been a long time coming. I feel like we’ve been talking about starting a podcast for such a long time, and we’ve had so many different ideas being thrown around the last couple of years. So I wanted to talk a little bit just about why we started it. Do you remember the first time we talked about starting a podcast?

Kristen: Yes, I do. Well, I can’t remember. Was it a phone call, or were we at Mom’s house, like, having a slumber party?

Lauren: No, it was a phone call. I’m pretty sure. Well, I’m sure it was mentioned at Moms one time or two in the late night chatting while we slept over. But I remember I distinctly remember exactly where I was walking in my neighborhood because I was postpartum with my first baby, like, a couple of weeks, probably. I don’t think I’d even come back to work yet. And you went, oh, my gosh, I’m not going to cry.

Kristen: It’s okay. This is a safe space.

Lauren: So I was struggling so much postpartum, I feel like it was not something I was prepared for. And you called me just to see how I was doing. You lived at this time, like, only 45 minutes from me, so nice to even call me, but you were just calling to see how it’s doing. And I remember crying to you. But then also I was just, like, talking about how I had discovered a podcast, and it was like we were both kind of starting to get into the true crime podcasts. We would text about them. We had a little crime sisters group message, and if other sisters want to join, you can join us. Some of them just know we’re not as comfortable with the crimes. But we were so fascinated. But I just remember thinking how entertaining it was and how nice it was to have something to listen to keep me company. And I just remember trying to figure out, like, this would be so fun. How could we do this and create a podcast along the lines of six sisters? But I mean, how do you do that with food? And we couldn’t really figure it out, but I just remember talking to you and just being like, am I crazy to be thinking about doing a podcast?

Kristen: So I just remember when we were talking about this, you were telling me, okay, I don’t want you to judge me. I just need to get something off my chest. And then you just kind of blurted it out. I want to start a podcast. And I just remember thinking, like, that would be amazing. I love podcasts. So crazy that it’s been three years and we are finally getting into it. I just love it.

Lauren: I know. Thanks for not thinking I was crazy for being so supportive. I’m all about the crazy ideas. Let’s just do it. I I know know. But it was so crazy how, like, I don’t know. I just remember feeling like because after having my baby, I lived well, we lived far away from everyone else. We were out in California. I’m still here. You left me, and it’s fine. But I just remember feeling, like, so alone.

Kristen: It’s hard. My husband and I, he did the medical school route, so we lived in seven different states. And with each state, with each move, it was tough. It is not an easy thing to move and to start making friends again and just getting into the swing of being the new person every time, it’s not fun. I remember.

Lauren: I know, but it was so crazy how having even strangers to listen to felt like I had friends, which sounds so dumb because those crime junkie girls are like, who is she? I have no idea who I am. And I’m like, oh, yeah, Ashley Flowers we’re really good friends. I think I had about ten that I would religiously listen to, and it just helped me come out of my slump. And so since then, I feel like we and we’ve talked about this a lot, but we’ve just had this desire to create a space for other women to feel that way too, right? To feel like they’re included.

Kristen: I love that. It’s like anyone is welcome. It doesn’t matter who you are. It doesn’t matter what you believe in. Everyone is welcome. And I love that.

Lauren: It’s just we can reach people that we haven’t been able to reach before. And there’s no algorithm, there’s no trying to get more likes and views. We’re just putting this out there. And if anyone wants to listen, if anyone wants to come and talk with us, it’s just here. So we’re super excited. Okay, I have a couple more questions for you because I feel like this kind of goes along with not necessarily podcasting, but just being a woman and like, finding a community and you know how hard it is, you talked about how you have been moving around a lot your whole married life. You guys are finally in a place where you’re a little bit more settled and kind of in a more permanent place. But what, to you, does it mean to have a sisterhood or a support system of women behind you?

Kristen: That’s a good question. And I didn’t really understand that until we did move away. My husband did medical school. We moved into this tiny, tiny town. Like, the only store they had was a Walmart. Everything else was like an hour and a half away and you were just like, secluded in this tiny little area. But they had amazing support groups for doctor wives, for all kinds of groups. Our community was amazing. We would put on fun runs, we would do dinners, we would do charity drives. And it wasn’t until I started jumping in and serving others that made me realize this is what having a sisterhood is really about, is really helping others and serving others. And it opened up the doors to so many different opportunities. It was amazing.

Lauren: I love that so much. There’s a book, I think you read it, but the Brooke Romney the I like the anyway book. She talks about when she was kind of in the same situation as you, living in a really small town, didn’t have a lot of friends, was kind of trying to figure out motherhood and being on her own away from family. And she started comparing herself to all of the moms in her town and was just feeling like, so inadequate. There were these moms doing canning and baking and perfect houses and just totally put together. And she was just looking at her DIY apartment and things like that because they’re on a college budget. And she talked about realizing that she might not be into canning, she might not be into baking, but she had other stuff to offer, and so she started getting groups of women together do other things. And I don’t know, I just love her just talking about creating the sisterhood and creating these groups to make these women feel that way because it makes such a difference. Finding a group of people that you can just be yourself around and to kind of get you out of that slump and to just rely on can make the world of a difference in your mental health and your emotional health, everything. It just makes a huge difference.

Kristen: It really does. It really does. I remember when we were there, there was a few of us that were just starting to run, and so we decided to get as many women as we can, as we possibly could to run this half marathon. And we got matching shirts, and there were 37 of us that ran this half marathon together. We trained together, we ran together, and it was just amazing. I love stuff like that. I love when you can find something that you like and just bring everyone in who wants to join you and just, I don’t know, make a little sisterhood the things that you love to do.

Lauren: Yes, I love that. And I feel like that’s something I hope people feel when they listen to his podcast, because to us having the space to come and just talk about stuff that’s not food related all the time. I know we talked about snacks, but we’re not having to share all the recipes and things, and we’re able to be a little bit more open about what’s going on behind all of that. I feel like hopefully other people can feel and relate to. Like, we’re just normal people and we talk about freezer meals and then we do all this stuff, but we still go out to eat with her families and we still like, tonight we had grilled cheese and my husband had cereal, and we’re just normal people. And I hope that people can feel that there’s room for them here within the podcast and on our kitchen counter. And I don’t know how many times I can use that phrase, but I hope it’s resonating through that there’s just a seat for everyone here, and I think that’s what we’re hoping is felt through this podcast. Okay, so I also wanted to ask you, because you have five daughters, you carried on this tradition, and it’s insane, they’re so cute, but what is something that you feel like you hope to teach your daughters about sisterhood and about womanhood growing up together?

Kristen: Okay, so because my kids grew up in different states, there was all kinds of different people. Like, when we were in Texas, we had people from India on one side, people from Pakistan on the other side. There were so many different cultures in every place that we lived. And I loved that for my kids. I absolutely loved it. Sometimes they would go to school and they were the only white children in their classroom, and I loved that. It was just something different. And so we had a lot of conversations about skin color or what other people believe in, and it really doesn’t matter. The most important thing is that we love everyone. And so if I can continue that on with my younger children who didn’t get to experience moving that often and meeting these kinds of people, that’s what I love to teach my children, is to just love everyone and accept everyone for who they are. So that’s what I would love to pass on to all of my kids.

Lauren: I love that so much. I feel like that’s something that mom was really good at teaching us when we were growing up. Just like, I don’t know, kind of along the lines of that, but just like that. No one’s better than anyone else.

Kristen: Oh, my goodness. I was going to ask you, would she tell you the same thing every day out the door? Don’t think you’re better than anyone else.

Lauren: Exactly! You’re not better than anyone else. Which sounds so funny to say now because I’m like, okay, mom, but really it made such a difference.

Kristen: Oh, my gosh. I was wondering because there’s like, what an eight year age gap between us? Yeah, I was wondering if she said that!

Lauren: She totally did. It was always that. It was always like, sit by the kids that don’t have anyone to sit by, things like that that you kind of just roll your eyes at when you’re, like, leaving for the bus or whatever in the morning. But now I’m to my own daughter. I’m like, you’d be nice to those kids in your church class. But I don’t know how. I don’t know how you do it with so many daughters. It’s so scary because of how girls treat each other in today’s world. It makes me so nervous to raise a teenage girl. She’s only two, but I’m already so nervous.

Kristen: She’s the cutest. No, I’ve started doing something even this last year of kind of repeating something as they leave out the door. And it’s like, remember, mom loves you. Choose the right sit by someone who doesn’t have a friend and don’t beat up any boys. And the last one is just a joke, but it’s just like they could totally take the boys, though. We know that they probably could. But just a little thing that I say and hopefully, like how our mom said it will sink in. Let’s be kind.

Lauren: Even like all these years later still sometimes in situations, like, mom will pop into my head and I’ll be like, oh, I’m not better than anyone else. I just need to realize everyone’s going through their own challenges. Everyone has their own crap. You don’t know what people are going through. Like, just trying to give people that benefit of the doubt. When I feel like maybe someone was not very kind to me or just those different situations that we’re placed in always I still hear her in my head telling me to remember everyone’s going through something and to be nice.

Kristen: Right. Makes a huge difference. She was so good at that. And it’s crazy because our mom’s mom passed away when she was 15. And I think about that a lot because I have a 14 year old, she’ll be 15 next week, and that’s when her mom passed, and she didn’t have a mom to teach her these things. And so once I was talking to her about it, I’m like, how did you know how to teach us? She’s like, I really just needed to focus on what I wanted my girls to do with their lives, and that’s what I just would try and teach them over and over and over again. And so that’s why that little saying, don’t think you’re better than someone because you’re not. It’s so true.

Lauren: I did not know that. I love that. Well, I knew about Grandma, but I didn’t know why mom said that to us all the time.

Kristen: It would be hard, like, not having really an example to you grew up kind of on your own as a teenager. I can’t even imagine. I can’t even imagine.

Lauren: And 15 is such a hard age. Like, I can’t no, it would be tough. But she’s a good woman. We love our mom, and she’s coming on the podcast. She’ll be on, I think, the next episode. I’m so excited.

Kristen: Okay, I have a question for you. So this world is a little bit different now than what it was even ten years ago with the Internet and the technology and all of that stuff. So my question for you is, what does it mean to you to be a woman in today’s world? Like, now?

Lauren: I was just talking to a friend about this because I feel like the life that we’re living right now as moms is so much different. Not in like a better or worse way, but just so different than Moms. Back even 20 years ago, there was no social media. There was no option to even be, like, a blogger or an Instagram or anything like that. There was no podcast or even, like, audiobooks, really, things like that, that kind of take up a lot of our time during the day or even a thing. And I mean, even with mom, mom worked growing up. She was always doing something. Usually she was at the school, working part time when we were all in school and doing little jobs like that. But I don’t feel like we just are seeing something different. And now, as working moms, I feel like I’m trying to figure out how to navigate this life of being a stay at home working mom in 2022 and not having like there’s not a generation of moms before us that have done this. We are the first ones doing everything. Like having to deal with all of the different things that come with social media and raising kids who are living in a world of social media and just like all these different things. And so, as I was thinking about being a woman in today’s world, it’s so stressful to me because I feel like there’s so much more pressure because the standard is set a little bit higher, in my opinion, because of social media and because of all of the things in just media in general and in the world. Like, I feel like women are put in such a different position as they were 20-30 years ago. But something that I did love kind of, I mean, piggybacking off of that, but more in a positive tone, was we grew up in Utah and Utah just released their 2022 Utah Fast 50 list. It’s the top 50 businesses that are growing the fastest in Utah. And it’s insane. Like, more than half of the businesses on that list are women owned.

Kristen: Really? Which is so cool. That is awesome. I am a big fan of that.

Lauren: Right. I’ll link it in the show notes down below. But it’s just so cool. I feel like that’s not something that would have been super normalized back in the day and not saying that you have to have like a top 50 business to be a successful woman, but it’s just really cool. I feel like there are a lot of different possibilities for us. And while it comes with a lot of pressure, I feel like it also comes with a lot of freedom. We can do cool things like start podcasts and we can do things like communicate with other women around the world and build these communities online and support each other from all of these different places. And I feel like that’s not an option that women had before. So I don’t know if that really answers the question, but I love that.

Kristen: I was going to say even like 10-12 years ago when we first started our blog, it really wasn’t a thing. Like people would kind of look down upon it like, oh, you’re a blogger. Yeah, I am. What’s your real job exactly? I know I go in to get like a car loan or something with our work because my husband, he did the school a lot of schooling and so they would just stare at me like, well, that’s not a job. It is, it’s a job. It’s always awkward.

Lauren: It is, but it’s becoming more normalized. I think people recognize it a little bit more. I think one of the things I’m most excited for about having this community here at the Kitchen Counter podcast is just that it’s for any woman, whether you’re a mom or you’re working or you’re a working mom or no matter your age, I mean, it’s for anyone. Anyone can come and listen and talk. And we’re just excited to feel like we have a place where we can actually be together and talk about things that are important to us outside of the things having to do with cooking and getting it on the table. Which we feel like it’s still really important and I’m sure it will be brought up many times. But I think it will just be so fun to have this space and this community. We are excited to expand our sisterhood to all of you who are listening and to feel like you have a place where your voice can be heard too. So with that, Kristen, do you have any final thoughts on sisterhood and what it means to us?

Kristen: I think I just want to say that you’re doing a great job. Whether you’re a mom, whether you’re working, whether you’re whatever you’re doing, like, keep doing what you’re doing, because really, you’re doing great and we love you and we support you 100%.

Lauren: I love that so much. Okay, well, we have not come up with any type of closing thing for these podcast episodes yet, so we will work on that. But for now, we’re so excited that you’re here. Thank you so much for listening. If you want to take just a couple of minutes or seconds and leave us a quick rating interview down below or share this episode with a friend, we would really appreciate it. And, yeah, we’ll see you guys next Monday. Thanks, guys. See you guys.

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